Partnership Systems vs Domination Systems & Coercive Control
This blog is a shout out to my colleague Elle Kamihira for her podcast Subject to Power and the terrific interview she conducted with Riane Eisler, titled Systems of Peace. As I continue to develop my Quicksand Model® of Coercive Control I often come across new, and not so new, research and theories that are compatible and useful enhancements to my model. […]
#Gaslighting – Webster’s Word of the Year for 2022!
Gaslighting is the term used for harming a person through manipulation and deception in order to make them believe they are going crazy. Webster defines it as: “psychological manipulation of a person usually over an extended period of time that causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or […]
Do I need a Coercive Control Expert Witness? (Part One)
If you have been targeted by a coercive controller, and you’ve done enough research to know that coercive control is the problem you are dealing with, then you probably already know how difficult it can be to explain to professionals what coercive control looks and feels like. Coercive control is a complex and nuanced form […]
Coercive Control and Self-Doubt: Am I the Problem?
Have you ever wondered if your partner or ex-partner was right about you being the abusive one? The question “Am I the problem?” can haunt those of us with empathy, those of us who are introspective about our behavior and our impact on others, especially the person we married and/or hoped to build a life […]
Coercive Control & Double Speak
I’ve covered Double Speak before, but today I’d like to go into this tactic, commonly used by coercive controllers, in a bit more depth. Double Speak is the Quicksand Model®’s term for the numerous ways that coercive controllers use language to manipulate and deceive others into viewing reality through their distorted lens. Coercive controllers perceive the world, and people […]
Coercive Control & Parental Alienation Awareness Video
If you need an expert in coercive control for your case, you can book a free consult with me here. If you need a coercive control trainer, speaker or consultant to help transform your organization to better serve victims, you can book a consultation here.
The Quicksand Model® of Coercive Control & Double Team
BioPsychoSocial Quicksand™ is the term I coined for the victim’s experience of coercive control. Coercive control is damaging to our bodies, our brains, our minds and our relationships, and therefore, has negative biological, psychological and social impacts on the target. These negative impacts can become overwhelming, often leaving the target feeling like they are suffocating and […]
The Quicksand Model® of Coercive Control & the Two New Doubles
As I work with more and more clients who have suffered the devastating impacts of coercive control in their “relationships” I have discovered two more doubles that coercive controllers rely upon to prevent their target’s escape from BioPsychoSocial Quicksand™. I have termed them the Double Cross and the Double Team. Today I will cover the Double […]
The Quicksand Model® of Coercive Control a BioPsychoSocial Model
UPDATE: June 30, 2024 / The BioPsychoSocial Quicksand Model® is still based on psychological, social and biological aspects of coercive control, but the name has now been shortened to The Quicksand Model® As I continue research and consultation with other experts in the fields of coercive control within domestic abuse, cults, extremist groups, human trafficking, gangs, trauma, betrayal trauma and coercive violence, I continually […]
Landmark Coercive Control Suicide Case
The feelings of hopelessness and helplessness caused by coercive control can be overwhelming, anxiety, terror, and depression-inducing, and often result in PTSD or CPTSD. Coercive control can also be life-threatening and life-altering. I have known for a long time that coercive control creates suicidal ideation, because I have experienced it myself many times. Every survivor […]