The Power & Control Wheel, developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project in Daluth, MN, was created in 1984 using the input of victims and survivors of domestic violence. It details the many abusive tactics used by abusers to control and dominate their intimate partners and/or ex-partners.
The Power & Control Wheel is still used today to outline the dynamic of domestic violence and family violence… also called intimate partner violence. The Power and Control Wheel has had an enormous influence on all of the systems that have been built to identify and address domestic violence in the United States. And, in some ways, it has been a very good model indeed. However, it also has some limitations. The world has changed a lot since this model was created, and abusers are particularly good at exploiting systems that don’t change, so I think it is time for a new model.
Some of the aspects of the Power & Control Wheel that we (and by we, I mean society and its response systems) got right are the following:
Examples of the main categories of coercive control and abuse are present on the wheel. There are examples of psychological abuse, emotional abuse, intimidation, isolation, threats, using children, and even, financial abuse and the use of male privilege. It’s a rather comprehensive list of abuse types… many of which can be identified as part of a pattern of coercive control.
Physical violence and sexual violence are also present on the Power & Control Wheel. These can be some of the most serious ways an abuser or coercive controller harms their victims (but not always).
Power & Control are placed at the center, demonstrating that these are the goals of the tactics being used.
And the model is characterized by a circle, showing that it’s not a linear pattern, but one that tends to go round and round, using different tactics at different times.
But I believe this model also has some pretty significant limitations. These are some of the problems I see with the Power and Control Wheel.
Visually, the model implies that physical violence and sexual violence are the main types of violence holding the pattern together. This implication has created assumptions about intimate partner violence and coercive control. And these assumptions have led to policies for detection and addressing intimate partner violence in our systems that make them, at best, ineffective, and at worst, fatal. According to Evan Stark, author of “Coercive Control – How Men Entrap Women in Personal Life”, extreme and frequent physical violence, which is how many people picture what occurs in intimate partner violence, is rare. And, even when physical violence is present, it is usually “low level assaults”, that may or may not happen frequently. And, according to Evan, many cases of coercive control don’t have ANY physical or sexual violence present at all. So… by placing physical and sexual violence on the outside rim of the circle, we have placed all of the emphasis of our detection on a factor that is far less significant than it is in reality. This has led to all sorts of problems in our systemic response.
2. There are lots of examples of tactics on the Power & Control Wheel. While this can be beneficial to a victim who is struggling to understand all of the pieces of the puzzle that held the pattern of coercive control together, examples also create a problem. The problem comes when an abuser is especially savvy, subtle, and manipulative. Victims of psychopaths especially (these are not the majority of cases, but psychopaths do make up about 1-4% of the population, and people with personality disorders make up between 15-20%) can find the Power & Control Wheel difficult to apply to their situation. Why? Because psychopaths, and covert narcissists especially, know how to hide their abuse with sleights of mind, lies, subtle re-framing of intent, and manipulative kindness. These, and other forms of gaslighting, can be very hard to see, and even though there are some examples on the Power & Control Wheel of these more subtle tactics, their placement on the wheel pales by comparison to that of physical and sexual violence on the wheel. Because of this, victims of very subtle abuse (which can sometimes be more damaging to the victim) may not recognize that they are trapped by a pattern of behaviors, since they can only find one or two examples listed. Most victims of intimate partner violence are women, and women are taught to give the benefit of the doubt in relationships, and not nag or judge too harshly. We are taught to make changes to our own behavior so as not to “provoke” a negative reactions from our partner. So, it can be extremely difficult to see only a few examples on the wheel and justify calling it abuse, domestic violence and/or coercive control.
3. Another thing that is missing from the Power & Control Wheel is the customized and individualized exploitative tactics that are a major foundation for coercive control. This one is a big one for me, because most of the coercive control that I suffered in my marriage was tailor-made to cause me extreme distress, but it was nearly invisible to everyone else. The goal of coercive control is to completely dominate the partner. And what better way to dominate someone than by the triggering their specific prior trauma, by violating their most deeply held values, and by betraying their trust? Activating someone’s prior trauma, especially when done by someone who has professed to love and support you, can cause extreme feelings of disorientation, confusion, fear and/or rage. Extreme fear makes a person compliant, rage makes them vulnerable to appearing “crazy”, “unstable”, or even “dangerous” to outsiders, and disorientation and confusion can cause all manner of mental, emotional and psychological damage. This is what my abuser did to me. All human beings have vulnerabilities. Some have more than others. People who love us do not exploit our soft spots to gain the upper hand, but someone who uses coercive control feels justified in doing just that. And, if you are unlucky enough for your coercive controller to also have sadistic tendencies… then watch out! A sadist enjoys tormenting, torturing and terrorizing their victim. Most abusers are not sadists, but those who are can use intimate knowledge of their victim to do extreme damage. One example in Stark’s book is of a woman who’s husband would bring out his gun to “clean it” anytime she did something he didn’t like. Having been previously threatened by him with that same gun, this was terrorizing to her, but invisible to anyone who might be visiting the couple. We cannot judge whether this man is a sadist based on this one example, but we can see that the damage to his wife from such an act could be deeply traumatizing. While placing examples on the Power & Control Wheel has been helpful for victims and advocates in identifying abuse, specific examples can also be misleading, especially when it comes to the subtle and individualized strategy of coercive control.
4. Which brings me to the thing that, in my opinion, is most obviously missing from this model for domestic violence… how systems and society respond to the coercive control of the abuser. What really holds the patterns of domestic violence and/or coercive control together are the responses (and anticipated responses) that a victim receives and/or perceives from the people around her them. In my case, many of my friends, family members, employees, clients, court professionals, police and child protection workers colluded, either intentionally or unintentionally, with my abuser to harm me further. Had the police and/or county attorney’s office helped me when I went to them for help early on, my coercive controller may not have escalated to a violent physical assault more than a year after I divorced him. In my case, and in all of the cases where I have advocated for victims, it is the overwhelming tendency of people to blame the victim that keeps most victims trapped in these situations. The Daluth Power and Control Wheel doesn’t provide this societal aspect as part of the model. This has left the response systems focused completely on the perpetrator and the victim, unable to make the necessary changes to support victims throughout the systems where they might try to seek help.
The Daluth Power & Control Wheel is now more than 35 years old. It was revolutionary for its time, but now it is time we update it with the new framework and understanding of coercive control. Here is one updated version that solves most of the issues I raised above. It is called the Maze of Coercive Control. You can read about it here. The one possible improvement I might recommend for the Maze of Coercive Control is to change the middle portion from “Power & Control” to “Control & Domination”. I think this more accurately reflects the intent of coercive control, and allows for victims to protect themselves with their own “personal power” without being identified with the perpetrator. (But that is a discussion for another day).
