What are the signs of coercive control?
Coercive control is a complex, nuanced, and dangerous pattern of abuses of power. It is the pattern of behavior that establishes and maintains oppression, and it is often said to be invisible in plain sight. In order to be able to see the signs of coercive control, we need to understand the biological, psychological, and […]
Context is King in Cases of Coercive Control & Domestic Violence
Commencing prior to 1970, the battered women’s movement, spearheaded by survivors and driven by aspirations to diminish domestic violence and safeguard women seeking refuge, initially framed domestic violence through a lens that persists in law enforcement and the legal system today. This lens, known as the violent incident model, continues to shape perceptions and responses to domestic […]
Victim or Victim Mentality? The Karpman Triangle & Coercive Control
Have you ever found yourself unjustly shouldering the blame for the actions of your coercive controller? Victim-blaming is a pervasive issue, particularly in cases involving coercive control. Unveiling the invisible nature of coercive control is crucial to understanding this phenomenon. Despite its prevalence, coercive control remains unnoticed in plain sight. Imagine a scenario where evidence […]
Consent & Coercive Control
Coercive control laws are being proposed and passed around the world. Laws that define coercive and controlling behaviors began in the UK, and Australia, Scotland, Canada and the US are taking steps to address coercive control in criminal and/or civil legislation. But coercive control legislation is moving slowly, and I believe one big reason for that is not that we haven’t defined […]
Partnership Systems vs Domination Systems & Coercive Control
This blog is a shout out to my colleague Elle Kamihira for her podcast Subject to Power and the terrific interview she conducted with Riane Eisler, titled Systems of Peace. As I continue to develop my Quicksand Model® of Coercive Control I often come across new, and not so new, research and theories that are compatible and useful enhancements to my model. […]
#Gaslighting – Webster’s Word of the Year for 2022!
Gaslighting is the term used for harming a person through manipulation and deception in order to make them believe they are going crazy. Webster defines it as: “psychological manipulation of a person usually over an extended period of time that causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or […]
Do I need a Coercive Control Expert Witness? (Part One)
If you have been targeted by a coercive controller, and you’ve done enough research to know that coercive control is the problem you are dealing with, then you probably already know how difficult it can be to explain to professionals what coercive control looks and feels like. Coercive control is a complex and nuanced form […]
Coercive Control and Self-Doubt: Am I the Problem?
Have you ever wondered if your partner or ex-partner was right about you being the abusive one? The question “Am I the problem?” can haunt those of us with empathy, those of us who are introspective about our behavior and our impact on others, especially the person we married and/or hoped to build a life […]
Coercive Control & Double Speak
I’ve covered Double Speak before, but today I’d like to go into this tactic, commonly used by coercive controllers, in a bit more depth. Double Speak is the Quicksand Model®’s term for the numerous ways that coercive controllers use language to manipulate and deceive others into viewing reality through their distorted lens. Coercive controllers perceive the world, and people […]
Coercive Control & Parental Alienation Awareness Video
If you need an expert in coercive control for your case, you can book a free consult with me here. If you need a coercive control trainer, speaker or consultant to help transform your organization to better serve victims, you can book a consultation here.