If you have been targeted by a coercive controller, and you've done enough research to know that coercive control is the problem you are dealing with, then you probably already know how difficult it can be to explain to professionals what coercive control looks and feels like.
Coercive control is a complex and nuanced form of abuse that is invisible in plain sight. It is insidious in it's subtle forms, and utterly terrifying when it escalates to forms that can include physical violence, sexual violence and/or veiled (or not so veiled) threats that leave you terrified of what the coercive controller may be capable of. In the hands of its most savvy practitioners, coercive control is intimate terrorism and pure torture!
I don't throw words like torture and terror around lightly. I'm not exaggerating or using hyperbole. Coercive control can, and often does, become torture and intimate terrorism. And, if left unchecked, it is almost inevitable that it will.
Unfortunately, coercive control is not well understood. I've heard people refer to coercive control as non-physical abuse or psychological abuse. And, while coercive control can include both of these, neither of these types of abuse, on their own, causes the absolute devastation and destruction that coercive control does.
So what is coercive control?
Coercive control is a pattern of behavior that combines force, fraud and fear to dominate another person or person. Coercive control is the pattern of behavior that establishes and maintains oppression. It is not a single act of abuse, coercion or control... it is a course of conduct, that in effect, entraps, or even enslaves, another person, robbing them of their dignity, their autonomy, and sometimes, even their very life. Severe coercive control can make you feel like your soul has been stolen from you.
These are not legal definitions for coercive control. They are mine. They are what I have pieced together over the years from my experience, education and other experts in the field, experts in coercive control like Evan Stark, Emma Katz, Lisa Fontes, Christine Cocchiola, Laura Richards and Andrew Cicchetti.
Many of the experts whose work I've studied have been targeted and victimized themselves by coercive control, which makes them (and myself) especially qualified to discuss the topic and explore possible remedies.
One of those possible remedies is testimony by an expert witness in coercive control. Civil courts, criminal courts and family courts often permit experts to testify on topics that judges and juries aren't qualified to assess. These expert witnesses can provide context and/or expert assessments of aspects in the case to assist the fact finders (judge and jury) to make better decisions.
And coercive control is certainly an aspect of cases that needs expert assessment. As I mentioned above, coercive control is not a single act, or even a few acts, of abuse, control or coercion. Coercive control is a pattern of numerous types of abuse woven together to cause the target to be dominated, trapped and unable to escape.
Currently, in cases that involve coercive control, social myths and misconceptions can easily color the perspective of the fact finders, making it very difficult for targets of coercive control to provide evidence of harm, danger and risk. And that's where an expert witness in coercive control can be very helpful.
There are two main types of coercive control expert witnesses; subject matter witnesses and case specific witnesses. Whether a subject matter witness or a case specific witness, a coercive control expert witness's job is to provide information on coercive control for the fact finders, so that they can make more informed decisions in the case. Subject matter witnesses are what you might call blind witnesses... meaning they do not know any specific information about the case. As a subject matter witness in coercive control, testimony is given to contextualize certain aspects of the case.
For instance, in a custody dispute in family court it is common for both sides to make allegations of abuse. This happens primarily because coercive controllers do not see their behaviors as abusive, and therefore, when someone points their coercive control out to them, they believe it is THAT person who is being abusive. It's a little hard to wrap your head around, but the bottom line is, it's related to projection and a coercive controller's inability to feel empathy or take responsibility for their actions. The other reason false allegations are common in these cases, especially custody cases, is that coercive controllers know that if they muddy the water with their own allegations, they can take, at least some, of the pressure off themselves, and hopefully avoid being held responsible for their coercive control.
In a custody case, when abuse is alleged by both parties, the court does the same thing everyone else does when they don't know who is telling the truth, and have no way to accurately assess the situation... they call it "mutual abuse", or they determine that both parties must be "high conflict" personalities. This can be devastating to the targeted victims in the case... especially the children, because when courts have no way to determine who is at fault, and their solution is to split custody down the middle, it harms everyone.
This is where a coercive control expert witness can come in handy. The coercive control subject matter witness can provide the context that these cases are missing. They can explain things like the myth of "mutual abuse" to the court. The expert can explain how easy it is to misinterpret signs of trauma as signs of deception, and come to the false conclusion that the targeted victim is "not credible". A coercive control expert can testify to the effects of trauma on the targeted victim, and help explain why they may be acting in ways that make them appear not credible... even though they are telling the truth.
A coercive control expert witness who is hired to assess a case for coercive control, can look at the specific details in the case and help determine 1. if there has been any coercive control, 2. who has perpetrated the coercive control, 3. the severity of the coercive control, 4. the impact of the coercive control on the targeted victim and the children and 5. what recommendations the expert makes to ensure safety, reduce risk of harm and promote healthy relationships for the parties moving forward.
Whether the coercive control expert is a subject matter witness or a case specific witness, they can provide the context that the coercive controller and their attorney have been doing everything in their power to cover up. They can testify to the research that supports limited contact between coercive controllers and children. They can assess the risks using evidence-based assessment tools, and they can make give targets the peace of mind that they have someone on their team that understands what they have been through and the importance of protecting children from coercive control.
