Governor Greg Abbott has vetoed SB-1109, a bill that would have provided for domestic violence, specifically dating violence, education for middle and high school children in Texas. The fact that the bill will save lives wasn't as important to our governor as it was to protect "parents rights".
On the surface protecting parents rights may seem like a good thing, and, it is in many instances. However, when it comes to educating children about abuse, the rights of parents should not be our first concern. Why? Because child abuse and domestic violence happen in the home, and much of it is perpetrated by fathers and step-fathers. So, by protecting the rights of parents to control what information children receive regarding abuse, our governor is also protecting perpetrators of domestic violence from being discovered. Abusers are notoriously skilled at twisting their negative behaviors to appear innocent while blaming everyone else around them. This gaslighting can be extremely confusing and harmful to adult and child victims of domestic abuse and coercive control. SB-1109 could help children begin to identify the red flags not only of dating violence, but also domestic violence and child abuse in their own homes.
Grand Prairie Assistant Police Chief, Ronnie Morris, who wrote the bill, has offered to include an exclusion for parents who wish to opt out of the education for their children if the governor will consider the bill in his special session, but I strongly believe including it would be a mistake. Domestic abuse and domestic violence education is only distasteful for one type of person... abusers. Loving and protective parents want their child to be educated on how to protect themselves from abuse, and how to not become abusive themselves. Healthy and supportive parents and their children want healthy relationship education and would greatly benefit from this legislation. I would argue that even the abusers will benefit... eventually.
The fact is that most abusers don't change, even with help. But statistics on this are based on decades of batterer intervention programs that have operated within a society that is still largely uneducated about coercive control, domestic abuse and violence. So when an abuser learns in some type of program that his behaviors are harmful and that he is choosing to harm others, they often revert quickly to abusive behaviors when the people around them continues to look the other way. As a society we must educate everyone on abuse and coercive control, and we must hold perpetrators accountable for their actions. Because until we start demanding that perpetrators change, it is very unlikely that they will.
Governor Abbott vetoing SB-1109 is not a win for parents rights, it is a lose for everyone! Vetoing this bill only serves to protect abusers, coercive controllers and predators. End Coercive Control USA calls on Governor Abbott to sign the bill as it stands. Texas can be a beacon of hope for victims and survivors of abuse and coercive control rather than continuing to ignore the horrific dangers that are ever-present when we prioritize the "rights" of one group of people over the lives of another.
And...if allowing parents to opt out is the only option Governor Abbott will consider, then I recommend we watch out for the parents who do so. It may be the quickest way to identify the coercive controllers and abusers in our midst.
